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He was married to her mother for over 20 years and they had an amicable divorce. I don't want to spend holidays with his ex, but his daughter wants to see both her parents on holidays. Is it too much to ask that she will have to visit each parent separately?

I don't have any real animosity toward the ex, I just don't want her around for every holiday.

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Ideally, plan the activities so that everyone can participate fully.

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I realize that in a few years from now, once my relationship with my bf is not "new", I might feel differently about his ex being around..right now, I'd prefer a little distance.

I also have an 8-year-old son (whose father is not involved).

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I like a little time alone with you during the holidays. As she gets older and gets involved in career, relationships, and perhaps marriage and children, she may require even less (if she gets married, she'll probably be expected to spend some of the holidays with her husband's family).

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